fanmail - kj-52

My arms are sliced up but I'm not embarrassed
It's the only way I get attention now from my parents
It's not like they really take the time to be caring
They just use me to watch the baby when they run they errands
My name is ___ I got a friend named Karen
She gave me your CD with the track for Eminem
You wrote a song called #1 fan I listened and
I wanted to know if you can help me like you was helping them
She had something even harder to be mentioning
Like every single day I struggle just with fitting in
Plus the boys won't give me no attention and
I get teased and made fun of by all my friends and then
See I'm feeling like I'm wishing now that I could end
My life cuz I'm sick and tired of all the time I spend
Trying to figure out how I could be worth anything
Can u help me KJ from your fan

I'm writing this letter
Cause I have to tell ya
I need some help from you
I'm writing this letter
I hope that you get it
I need some help from you

I live with my mom ever since my parents split
And At home I spend my time on the Internet
Looking at porn Im addicted and I'm sick of it
Myspace dot com is mostly where I'm getting it
On top of that there's videos that I can watch
And I really wanna quit but its like I can't stop
See I'm scared that I'm just gonna get caught
And when I see a girl all I think is dirty thoughts
And its not that I don't know that it's really wrong
But its right there for me every time I'm logging on
I got all your CD's I really like your songs
Well I downloaded em but anyway moving on
My screen name is KJ-52 is the bomb
I want to do a website KJ rock's dot com
I really some help cuz I can't tell my Mom
Oh by the way my real name is ___

I'm writing this letter
Cause I have to tell ya
I need some help from you
I'm writing this letter
I hope that you get it
I need some help from you

I took the time just to write you
We play you every Wednesday at my youth group
I love your music and we all think that you's cool
But I been struggling ever since I moved to a new school
See everybody thinks that I'm the perfect Christian girl
I had a hard time trying to believe that God is real
I've been on mission trips and camps the whole deal
My dad had cancer tho I prayed that God would heal
But he died anyway so it's hard to feel
Like he cares about me so was it God's will
To take away my dad I really got a raw deal
Sometimes I just want to swallow all my mom's pills
When I pray I really doubt it
I've lost my way or maybe I've never found it
I been smoking and drinking nobody knows about it
By the way my name is ___ don't mispronounce it...

If I could write to every kid that's out there
Every kid that's hurting feels like nobody cares
I would tell them that God can wipe away tear
And he's right near and I would say it quite clear
Your here for a reason you're not a mistake
You are a special creation that God himself made
To the victims of abuse to every girl that was raped
You can live you can be free from your pain
And find strength and no longer be ashamed
You can find peace and hope In Jesus name
You aint gotta live with this hurt every day
Christ came to give you life in a much better way
To every kid right now that's full of hate
And bitterness I'd tell em just to give it all away
To the one that came to take all the blame
That's what I'd write here's what I'd say