lost perfection a. coulrophobia - between the buried and me

These hours seem like years...I've been staring at this wall, wondering
when it's going to take all of our lives. I'm just glad we have jokes. I
think way too much back here. My eyes are slowly closing; boredom is
causing this loss of interest. When will I awake? Asleep...
This party of four includes three grown adults and myself. The first
adult is very shy and wise enough to keep the second one from
conversation. (They're on a mission). Gender is not recognized. The
third adult is a male and talks too much. The stench of shit is in the
air...
The room storms with laughter...fours turns into a hundred and the noise
is unbearable. "It's time, you are in hell, this place will kill itself
soon!"
I cry, and the hands surround me. Born into a hell...
I never wanted to wake to this. I hae experienced nothing, yet I feel I'm
the only one who has not done harm. If only I could understand how to
change things...I can't fucking think. The noise is unbearable. THE
noise STOPS.